When Everything Falls Apart
The call was clear – incontrovertible after so many fleeces and miraculous confirmations – “Go! Sell all and trust me. I have given you a land flowing with milk and honey…” So Abraham went. As have so many others thru the ages – including Dan and Regina, when they heard the same urgent Command.
There were so many Promises and Visions of how things would be, what we would do, what God would do. We came with enthusiasm, trusting God for so many miracles – and it happened! God showed up and we were miraculously led and provisioned and empowered.
Then why? Why still, after so many years – still living in tents? Still pushed this way and that? Why so many struggles and failures and detours? Has God not promised a land? An abundance of provision? Orphans rising up to become leaders of the nations? A true church of Jesus worshiping in every Toka Leya village, led by indigenous men and women of God? Isn’t this what God Promised?
The Promise versus The Problems. Which is reality? Which has the last word? Which do I listen to and make my direction according to? Is this what it means to walk by faith? To be honest, sometimes it just sucks! I want to wilt under it and give up. Or go the way of least resistance.
Yes, we do see small signs of the Promises coming to pass – the children are growing as we had pictured in our dreams; the simple illiterate former sinner is now giving the simple gospel to small clutches of village seekers around his cooking fire; the church in America is being moved by compassion to touch the poverty of this dark world.
And yet – it is as if we see this “from a distance”- yes the Promise is literally coming to pass…. Yet the foreground is mountains upon mountains of problems and failures and struggles. This is our daily fare.
- In June one of our closest allies, supporters and friends bitterly turned against us and spread mistrust far and wide.
- In July I had a major medical breakdown that is still affecting me.
- In August one of our orphans that we had counted as our own child, started acting sexually towards other kids and we had to remove him from the home.
- Again in August one of our best house mama’s died of a cursed disease that is rampant and speaks of failure and shame.
- In September one of our long-term gospel workers confessed he was having an affair with a lady in the village, and so had to step down and marry her.
- All this time, since last February, we have been going thru the most severe financial drought of our lives.
- And now, just a week ago, another one of our long-term gospel workers walked away in a day – because of financial unsustainability. Which caused such a shock and disappointment on our diminished and discouraged team that it pushed one of our 6-month Swedish interns over the edge into critical burnout and secured her departure.
Most of the time while living the life of faith one is still looking around and wondering how he got himself into this mess! Most of the time we are working thru the disappointments and struggles of living in Africa; and we are needing to constantly remind ourselves that we are walking in obedience, we are trusting for something more, we are waiting on God’s power to act and fulfill His Word. This is the life of faith. Just because it was promised by a powerful God does not mean it is all going to happen easily! No! Instead, we are trying to Not focus on the circumstances as if they have the last word. But looking instead at the Word of God that sent us, and the Promise that emboldened us. Holding onto that for dear life!
Are you walking by faith? Are you straining forward for some Promise that is elusive, that you know God wants, and you want, and you are trying with all within you and trusting and crying and praying for it? If you are, you are a blessed man or woman. Or are you only straining and clawing for making a living and getting your security and retirement in place? I feel sorry for you. You are missing out of the very purpose of life on earth.
Praise God with us for 10 new sponsors for the FAMILY TABLE kids program! 10 more kids going to school, getting food, getting discipleship and tutoring, and involvement with a wholesome community for personal support.
Praise God for 3 months in a row of Finances in the Black – where we bring in as much as we spend. We have been leaning heavily on God for most of this past year, hearing His confirmation that we should be still and wait on Him – the boats of provision are on their way! Well I would say, they have arrived! I thank all of you generous partners.
The children in our House of Moses are so excelling in their school – I think all of them, except the new two, are in the top 5 of their class academically. 4 of them this year were invited to skip a grade! And Shamira, in the House of Noah, passed into her 10th grade – quite an accomplishment from what she has come thru.
The Twashuka Community Center that was completed last year, and the all-volunteer community school that began meeting in it even before completion, is still growing and going strong. This year they have decided on uniforms!
Praise God, our Board of Directors has been rebuilt better than ever. Let me introduce them.
- Stephen Nelms has extensive missionary experience in Zambia, and is now one of the leading figures in Gospel Link – a ministry that supports indigenous ministers around the world. He brings us a wealth of wisdom and experience.
- Mark Proeger was a missionary with All Nations for three years and recently returned to the States to mobilize students into missions. He is beginning a mission exposure school in Texas, and this summer will lead their first class to our ministry in Zambia for a few weeks. Mark also brings with him a wealth of ideas and connections.
- There are a couple more people who are giving input into our discussions but have not yet decided whether they can join the Board or not.
WAYS TO GET INVOLVED: ATTENTION AVID FISHERMEN!
HAVE YOU EVER DREAMED OF FLYING TO ONE OF THE WORLD’S BEST FISHING LAKES FOR A 5 DAY FISHING SPREE?
NOW’S YOUR CHANCE!
A world-class sports lodge in northern Manitoba has donated a $12,000, 5 day, fly-in fishing trip for some lucky winner. We are raffling tickets for a donation of $50 to Love’s Door. (Date: June 30-July5. Flight from Thompson to a remote lake in MB is included in the trip, along with one-night bed and breakfast on the way in and out of Winnipeg MB. Must provide own transport to Thompson MB. Write to us for full details and tickets: firstname.lastname@example.org )
We are still looking for a base maintenance manager – 1-3 year term. Apply here.
Pray with us for a new vehicle, as our old one is dying.